Exceeding my own expectations
Three out of the six mornings a week I'm at the gym I do a cardio workout. I get on the eliptical machine and I go and go and go until I can't breathe that easily and I think I can't go any more, and my side starts to hurt and the sweat is dripping into my eyes, I start thinking about faking fainting, just so I can stop ... and then I go even HARDER! When I'm done, it takes me at least 20 minutes to fully recover, and only THEN do I feel really good. And then two days later, when I have to do it again, and I don't want to, I have to tell myself that I did it just two days earlier, so why is today different? And I have to admit to myself that I'm right, and surely I will be able to get through that 20 minutes of torture today as well. Damn my logical self. It seems I CAN go further than I had let myself believe.
This morning I said to Caleb, as we were walking back to the car, "Every morning I think I can't do it, and then I do. Its like I'm showing myself up." As I continue on my path to increased personal health and weight-loss, I am often amazed at my own determination and stick-to-itiveness (its a word). I even wonder some days, "Who am I?! I'm not this disciplined." I surprise myself all the time with this thing. And yet the next morning, there I am, gettin' up at the crack of dawn, driving to the gym, only to beat my body into submission once more, making it go further than it thinks it can go. (I admit if it weren't for my husband, most mornings I probably wouldn't get past turning the alarm off, just so I can go back to sleep. I hate getting out of bed.)
But all of this is making me wonder ... are there things in my life that I'm not pursuing, not doing, not challenging myself with ... because I've somehow talked myself into believing I can't do it? What other occasions in my life could I "rise to," if I just challenged myself? Maybe more of who I wish I were is actually attainable. What else is out there that I could surprise myself with?
Hm.
This morning I said to Caleb, as we were walking back to the car, "Every morning I think I can't do it, and then I do. Its like I'm showing myself up." As I continue on my path to increased personal health and weight-loss, I am often amazed at my own determination and stick-to-itiveness (its a word). I even wonder some days, "Who am I?! I'm not this disciplined." I surprise myself all the time with this thing. And yet the next morning, there I am, gettin' up at the crack of dawn, driving to the gym, only to beat my body into submission once more, making it go further than it thinks it can go. (I admit if it weren't for my husband, most mornings I probably wouldn't get past turning the alarm off, just so I can go back to sleep. I hate getting out of bed.)
But all of this is making me wonder ... are there things in my life that I'm not pursuing, not doing, not challenging myself with ... because I've somehow talked myself into believing I can't do it? What other occasions in my life could I "rise to," if I just challenged myself? Maybe more of who I wish I were is actually attainable. What else is out there that I could surprise myself with?
Hm.
I know EXACTLY what you mean with how horrible working out can be. And how tremendous it feels after you finish. I've started running in 40 degree weather. I am woman, hear me roar! WE CAN CONQUER THE WORLD!
Posted by
melanie |
12:34 PM